Our son, Oliver, was a big factor in our decision to move to France at this specific time in our lives. The timing just seemed right — at 7 years old, he is young enough to make friends fairly easily and adapt to new situations without too much difficulty. He’s also at the age when learning a new language can happen within a matter of months.
Life in France has been dramatically different for all of us — especially Oliver. Here are just a few of the biggest differences between his life in the U.S. and his life here.
1. School. School is by far the biggest difference between our life in the U.S. and life here in France! Back home, Oliver was in the first grade at a public elementary school in Richmond, Virginia. Here in Bordeaux, he attends a small private Catholic school, and he’s in a class that combines both CE1 and CE2 students (7- and 8-year-olds, or basically the equivalent of second and third graders). Here are some of the biggest differences:
- The school is fully French! He does have tutors to help him with learning French, but neither of them speak very much English.
- The school day lasts from 9 a.m.-4:30 p.m.
- No school on Wednesdays! This varies across France, but most schools either have no school or a half-day on Wednesdays.
- Students get an hour-and-a-half lunch break. They can either go home or eat lunch at school and then play/hang out with any remaining time.
- The cantine (cafeteria) serves homemade food featuring fresh, local ingredients. And there’s always a cheese course!
- They often have recess (recreation) three or four times a day, depending on their behavior and how quickly they complete assignments. Recess takes place in a small, fully enclosed courtyard. The kids usually play basketball, touche-touche (tag), or babyfoot (foosball), sometimes unsupervised.
- The students often take outings to a nearby gym, park, and basketball court for additional exercise. These outings are not discussed with parents beforehand.
- According to Oli, students at his school are much more focused and well-behaved than students at his American school.
- In general, the school year has six weeks of classes followed by a two-week break, repeated from September through early July.
Now that we live in a small third-floor apartment in the city center, we have to be a lot more intentional about socializing. We usually set up a few play dates each week with friends from school — both English- and French-speakers. We’ve also met a few expat families in the neighborhood, and we meet up with them in nearby parks once or twice a week. This experience has also made Oli a lot more confident when it comes to making new friends. Both here and when we travel, he has no problem approaching a group of kids and jumping right in to play, regardless of any language barrier. I absolutely love this, and I think it’s one of the best things that’s come out of this experience so far!
3. Hobbies. Because he does have more solo downtime here, Oli has more time to focus on his personal interests — which I think is a good thing! He’s started taking guitar lessons on Wednesdays, and he’s having fun learning some of his favorite songs. He still loves doing the Rubik’s Cube, and he’s always challenging himself to beat his personal records. He’s also gotten several students in his class into cubing. He loves reading, and he’s currently plowing through the Percy Jackson series. And he still loves being active — he and Todd regularly go skateboarding, rock-climbing, and play baseball in the park with friends.
4. Becoming Bilingual. Contrary to what some people told us before we moved, Oli isn’t just “soaking up” French like a sponge. He has a tutor spending a lot of time with him every day at school, and though he’s making progress, he’s working incredibly hard to do so! He often comes home from school exhausted, but he’s also super proud and excited to share the milestones, like understanding his teachers and communicating with his classmates. I feel certain that he will be near fluent in French by the end of the school year, and I am so excited for him — and jealous! It’s going to take my aging mind much longer to get there. But at least I know my kid will be able to help me along the way. Already, he’s having way too much fun correcting our accents.
5. The Little Things. There are so many other little differences about our life here that have directly affected Oli. He’s developed an appreciation for good bread and French pastries, and he can recognize the difference between an artisan-made loaf and one that’s baked in a factory. He’s gotten used to riding on the back of the e-bike in all weather conditions, and sometimes rides his own bike around town. He’s learned proper tram etiquette and how to show respect for the neighbors in our apartment building (though he sometimes has to be reminded to keep it down when he gets a little too energetic).
Our life has changed a lot, but I’m so relieved that one thing hasn’t really changed at its core — and that’s Oli! He is growing from this experience in so many ways, but he is still our goofy, sweet, caring kid who loves McDonald’s and watching funny dog videos. And he seems content to stay true to himself, even though he’s a little bit different than his peers. I had feared that he might start trying to conform so he wouldn’t stand out, but he’s told me that he actually likes being different. Apparently it’s cool to be the American kid?