An american family's life en francais

Expat Diaries: It’s not au revoir, it’s à bientôt

We’re in the final days of our time in France, and it feels surreal. We’re all excited to be back home with our friends and family, but there’s an undertone of sadness as we make our final goodbyes. The last day of school, the last meetup with friends, the last apero in the square, the last boulangerie run. How did we get here so soon?

On our final date night, Todd and I noticed that the holiday lights are already going up around town, the same ones that greeted us when we arrived. Christmas in France was pure magic, and I’m so grateful that we got a chance to experience it. It feels like we’ve truly come full circle as the holiday buzz begins again. We’ll miss the twinkling lights strung over the streets and the beautifully crafted bûches de Noël, the elaborate shop window displays and stacks of chocolate advent calendars in the grocery stores.

Without Halloween or Thanksgiving here, fall doesn’t feel particularly noteworthy. There aren’t a lot of trees in Bordeaux, but the few and far between are inching toward peak foliage. I’m happy to see it, but even happier to know we’ll be in Richmond before the leaves fall. It’s by far our favorite season in Virginia, and well worth heading home a few weeks ahead of schedule.

Oliver insists he’s not a bit sad to leave, but I suspect he’ll miss his little school and the friends he’s made there. I know for sure he’ll miss having four recesses per day, long lunches, and Wednesdays off. These final weeks of classes have really solidified his grasp on the French language, and he comes home singing French songs and reciting schoolyard chants, recounting silly stories from a fun-filled day. It’s hard to believe this is the same kid who nervously walked into that same school less than a year ago knowing only a few words of French. He’s now bilingual, with the floppy, long hair of many of his classmates. We are immensely proud of him.

Our apartment has been a mess for the last few weeks as we’ve been packing to leave. We shipped eight big boxes home — two more than we came with, which shouldn’t have surprised me so much. Books and brocante finds, clothes and paintings, all of the things that will find a treasured place back home in Richmond, reminding us of our time in France.

The suitcases are mostly packed and waiting by the door, dangerously close to overweight. I’m carefully considering how to allot the final pounds, browsing the aisles of Monoprix for souvenirs for ourselves and others. Can we make space for a small cooler filled with French butter? The little spice collection I’ve built over the past year? A bag of sea salt from Normandy, a candle that will always remind me of our French apartment? One more sweater from Sezane?

Before we head out on that final morning, we’ll do one more cleaning of this apartment that’s served as a cozy, comfortable home base. I’ll miss the parquet floors and the giant windows overlooking the ancient limestone building across the street where a headless cherub is perched atop one of the windows. I’ll miss spying a magpie hopping across the terracotta rooftops and the occasional spectacular sunset from the balcony. I may even miss trekking up and down the tight spiral staircase, though I won’t miss lugging groceries to the third floor.

In just a few days, a friend will take us and our many suitcases to Bordeaux’s Saint-Jean train station, where we’ll board a high-speed train bound for Paris. Bordeaux will disappear behind us, and I know it will be a bittersweet moment. We’ll spend a couple of days in the City of Light, just as we did at the beginning of this adventure. And soon enough we’ll be boarding a plane to take us back across the Atlantic. 

This feeling is so familiar, of excitement tempered by sadness. It seems like just yesterday I was feeling this back home in Richmond, preparing for our move to France. But there is one key difference between now and then. I didn’t know what was in store for our family as we embarked on our new life in France. Now, as we close this chapter, we know exactly what’s waiting for us on the other side. And I can’t wait to get there.

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